Season 1 Episodes 39 & 40
Airdate: November 29 & 30, 1993
Angel Grove is celebrating its first ever Power Ranger Day. The people are out in the park, and so are the Ranger kids, who plan to morph and make a public appearance later.
Jason, the Red Ranger, and Randy, the Black Ranger, talk about being Power Rangers (they don’t have much else in common). Randy wants to get laid, so asks out Angela, a girl he’s been harassing for some time now.
“Oh Randy,” replies Angela, “if you were a Power Ranger I’d say yes in a minute.” How ironic!
Randy is about to whip out his Power Ranger coin, and say, “My zord isn’t the only mastodon I command.” But Jason stops him because they need to mingle around to lessen the chance of anyone thinking they could be the Power Rangers. What would also lessen the chances would be if they would wear more than one color every day.
Billy, the Blue Ranger; Trini, the Yellow Ranger; and Kimberly, the Pink “Ranger” say hi to Ernie, the owner of the gym, but he does not say hi back.
Bulk and Skull are jealous of all the attention the Rangers are getting. Bulk wants the two of them to be the town superheroes despite having no powers and being horribly out of shape. Bulk and Skull duck into a photo booth, which starts rocking as they throw their clothes outside. The gay jokes write themselves.
The two change into flamboyant costumes and go up on stage to make a speech before the town announcing themselves as Incredible Bulkster and Super Skull. Of course none of the townsfolk are impressed. One little brat shouts, “Show us some of your superpowers!” Bulk and Skull respond by posing in their costumes while the while town laughs at them. Those two are desperate for attention. If this was 13 years later, they could do this in their bedroom and put it on YouTube for laughs, and have Tosh.0 call them gay.
Suddenly, Bulk and Skull disappear. The rest of the town follows, leaving the Ranger kids alone in the park. They teleport to the Command Center, where Zordon the Floating Head tells them what’s up. Rita has directed a “vortex beam” to Earth and taken the town’s population to her “dimensional vortex”.
Rita’s vortex beam is directed at Africa.
That’s the iconic “Blue Marble” photograph taken by Apollo 17 astronauts in 1972. Being in the public domain, it is used by TV shows and MST3K-level movies that want to depict outer space but don’t have anywhere close to the budget for proper effects. The first MMPR movie used the same photo, because that was a cheap ass movie.
Or it could be that Angel Grove is in Zimbabwe.
Rita transports her Moon house to downtown Angel Grove. Zordon warns that this will make her ten times more powerful. Rita has moved up the power scale from possessing the equivalent of power of Togo to the power of Bolivia.
Now Rita is able to summon Cyclopsis, Goldar’s zord. Goldar can barely walk straight, how can he operate a giant fighting robot?
The Rangers morph and call on Megazord, but Cyclopsis kicks their ass with its teleportation and shit. Jason flute plays for Dragonzord to appear and they switch it up to Mega-Dragonzord and the T. Rex. But Cyclopsis deflects their attacks, because instead of attacking at once and enjoying a two-to-one advantage, the Ranger zords attack one-at-a-time. Mega-Dragonzord falls down and Cyclopsis stomps it. Goldar then fires off Cyclopsis’ hands, which wrap around the zords, lift them up and electrocuting them. It looks like Cyclopsis is peeing on them. Robot pee is electricity.
Zordon calls on Titanus, the tank zord that resembles a brontosaurus. It was kind of a sudden jump to Megazord combining with it to form Ultrazord. I prefer when the robot combining sequences are long and drawn out. Cyclopsis is destroyed.
Rita is pissed and causes sinkhole in the middle of the city which engulfs Titanus. Megazord tries to hold onto its neck, but Rita actually says “No you don’t!” and zaps their grip apart. I don’t know whose fault that crappy effect is, us or the Japanese, but it makes me hate both countries now.
Rita then summons Lokar, which is a floating head that appears over the city. I wonder if Lokar and Zordon ever met at a floating head club or something.
Zordon informs the Rangers that with Lokar, Rita can recreate Cyclopsis. And if the Ranger’s lose, the people of Angel Grove will be trapped in Rita’s vortex—FOREVER!!! Better get on it then.
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