Switched at Birth: 1.08 “Pandora’s Box”

Season 1 Episode 8
Airdate: July 25, 2011

Daphne looks though the photos of Bay found in the guitar case. Regina walks in and sees her.

“Put those back!” Regina says and claims Kathryn gave them to her. Daphne knows it is a lie.

“I knew” Regina confesses. “I knew that you and Bay were switched.” OMG! WTF! FMUTAWABBD!* Before Regina can say more, the doorbell rings. It’s Kathryn. She wants to give Regina a scarf. “It seems like something that you’d wear,” Kathryn says because some of her friends’ maids wear it. Regina signs to Daphne to keep the photos a secret. Outside, John tells Regina that the hospital has something on her and asks what that could be. Regina acts like she has no idea and claims to no habla ingles.

Daphne bumps into Wilkie in the hallways of Buckner. “You want to get out of here?” asks Daphne. “Sure,” says Wilkie. “I mean I’m suspended so I have to.” Wilkie and Daphne drive to her old house in East Riverside. Daphne says this neighborhood is perfectly safe. Wilkie replies that she can’t hear the sirens. He really said that and I laughed.

John and Kathryn meet with their lawyer. She prepares them for an upcoming deposition by asking the kind of tough questions the hospital lawyer will ask. Kathryn can’t handle it, gets flustered, and then confesses to killing a man in 1988.

Wilkie and Daphne drink under a bridge.

Meanwhile, Bay and Emmett make out in the quad. They then go to his bedroom, where Bay sees a wall full of photos he took of Daphne. Normally, only girls have the wall of their room devoted to photos. When boys do it, they are normally stalkers. Bay says that Daphne looks like Rachel McAdams. I don’t know if Daphne does because I can’t remember what Rachel McAdams looks like. I always get her confused with Amy Adams and Adam Carolla. To please Bay, Emmett covers the wall with a bedsheet and waits until she leaves to masturbate to the photos.

Wilkie finds a boot on his car. He has nine unpaid tickets. Man, I’ve seen Parking Wars, you don’t want to get caught up in that quagmire. Daphne and Wilkie makeout in his car until it turns dark. Wilkie asks her about the switch and seems to get off on it.

Emmett is listening to Bay gab when Daphne calls him for a ride. Emmett tries to explain but Bay can never understand him, so she gets jealous and leaves in a huff. But Emmett has to do his duty. Also he doesn’t have to listen to Bay anymore, so that’s a bonus.

Toby shows Bay something. He dug through the garage and found a magazine advertisement where an MLB-era John Kennish is in his underwear. It’s not nearly as magnificent (or erotic) as Burt Reynolds circa 1972:

Burt Reynolds

 

This makes it look like Regina is a wandering guitar player, hitchhiking from city to city to make her way in life.

Regina wants to get rid of the guitar case. But the Kennishs are all outside when she places it in her car, so they all ask her about it. She drives to a gas station dumpster, but can’t bring herself to get rid of all the photos of little Bay. When Bay was little, her name was Cove.

Daphne spent the night in Emmett’s couch so Regina didn’t see that she has been drinking. I wonder if she called home so Regina doesn’t wonder where she is. Daphne is jealous because she sees that Emmett snapped several pictures of Bay. Emmett needs to learn that he can only be creepily obsessed with one woman at a time. Those are the rules. What happens when he grows up and stalks his first celebrity? He can’t mail disturbing letters to Kristen Stewart and Jennifer Lawrence. That would be ridiculous!

Toby is digging around for more sexy advertisements of his dad. “Sometimes things are best left in the past.” Regina warns him. “Start digging around you never know what you’re going to find.” I bet the writer felt so proud when he wrote that line.

Bay goes to the deaf school to ask what is in the guitar case. Daphne tells Bay to ask her mom. Bay asks if by my mom, she means Regina. Daphne says yes,“Because she’s certainly not mine.”

Kathryn pretending she can read.

At the deposition, the hospital drops their bombshell: a blood test from 1998 that shows that Regina and Daphne are not biologically related. Regina knew about the switch 13 years ago! God, that was 13 years ago? I feel old all of the sudden.

Now everyone is fucking pissed off at Regina. She tries to explain herself. Angelo, the father, always suspected that Daphne was not his daughter because Italians don’t have gingers except for that Ralph guy from The Sopranos. After little Daphne was condemned to be deaf due to meningitis, he had a DNA test done which confirmed it. And he left, Regina had a second test that confirmed it. Since Regina was at the lowest point in her struggling with alcoholism, she was afraid that the state would take Daphne away if she came forward with that information, and also the Kennishs would keep Bay from her. Kathryn says they would have never done that to her, even though they wanted to on the very first episode after they found out about her DUI. “I had nothing but this little baby,” she cries. Regina hired a private investigator to follow Bay. But because the girls were already 3 and used to their homes, she felt it would be best to not tell the Kennish family.

“What about me?” Bay cries. “I grew up a rich girl instead of a poor Hispanic on the Eastside. You robbed me of a childhood!” Bay makes it very hard to sympathize with her.

Neither Bay nor Daphne want to speak to Regina. John kicks her out of the house.  John and Kathryn discuss pursuing custody of both daughters. Kathryn has some reservations over cutting out Regina and says that Bay wants to embrace her ethnic identify and Regina has helped her with that. “We’ll get her a damn Selena album,” John replies.

Toby is the only person who wants Regina to stay being the least affected by all of this. They hug. Bay is standing behind her brother, but instead of saying something, she looks right at Regina and then goes inside. Bay knows how to be a bitch. She may have Regina’s genes, but she grew up under Kathryn’s tutelage! From a window, Daphne watches Regina leave. She closes the window. This is very symbolic.

*Fuck Me Up The Ass With a Big Black Dick

Final Thoughts:

Wow. Two good episodes in a row. Two episodes out of the first eight have been watchable. That’s really good by ABC Family standards.

Finaler Thoughts:

This episode title makes me think of Pandora Boxx.