Switched at Birth: 1.22 “Venus, Cupid, Folly, and Time”

Season 1 Episode 22
Airdate: March 20, 2012

Emmett gets down on one knee in front of Bay and opens a jewelry box. OH MY GLOB OH MY GLOB OHMYGLOOOOOOOBBBBBBB!!!!

Inside are two earplugs. It’s to ask her to the Carlton prom (the theme is Russell Simmons Presents Deaf Prom Jam). The earplugs are because deaf people have loud proms. They also need to be well lit or else no one can communicate.

Regina tells curator boyfriend that her mom will be out of town and Daphne will be out late for prom. Sweet she has the place to herself.

Kathryn shows her husband the red dress she plans to wear to prom. They will be chaperones, which is great because neither of them understands sign language all that well. Man, everyone is really looking forward to deaf prom. Doogie Howser lawyer enters and says tracked down the nurse who may have been Angelo’s secret sauce source. He also say only one of them can come with him to talk to her, because too many people might scare her. The truth is he isn’t old enough to drive and he can only fit on person on the handlebars of his bicycle.

Regina gets a phone call from Angelo. He has is detained by Homoland Sex-curity (take THAT government!). He asks for help to hire an immigration lawyer. Regina says that even if he is allowed to stay in the US, he will have to stay away out of her life.

Kathryn and Regina talk about the kids and prom. Kathryn says Toby and his friends rented a hotel suite for afterward. So she placed a box of condoms in his bathroom (on the advice of her lawyer, seriously, her lawyer said to). It might a good idea, though. Nothing could make sex less cool for a teenager than having your mom give you condoms. He won’t be able to look at them without thinking of her, let alone use one.

Wilkie sees a wanted poster of himself on the Bucker hallway. Daphne then “arrests” him with handcuffs. This is her weird way of asking him to prom. The whole hallway full of kids wonders what kinky sminky is going on. Wilkie says he can’t because he has a Modern Civ paper due. He means he’s going to play Civ IV all night. I don’t understand how a class paper would keep him from going to prom. Because aren’t proms on Saturday night? He can write it Friday or Sunday. It’s not like it’s due Sunday morning. On the other hand, this is really short notice to be asking kids to prom that week, especially when it’s for school they don’t go to so wouldn’t have been planning for.

Kathryn gives Bay and Daphne some prom gifts. She is more excited about prom than the girls. “I got you all condoms!” she exclaims. No, actually it’s jewelry for Bay and a purse for Daphne. Daphne doesn’t have a date, so Bay says they can go as a group. So Daphne goes to the carwash to ask Travis to come with them. Travis calls the kids he goes to school with jerks. Travis seems like the kind of person you’d want to go to a party with.

Doogie and Kathryn meet the source at her house. Doogie says there is no record of her being a nurse at the hospital, but she claims to have been an independent contractors and says the hospital ran the nurses ragged. She says now the hospital imprints babies with barcodes. Barcodes. “They’re laying the groundwork for the coming of the anti-Christ.” OK, she is crazy and Kathryn better stop eating that cookie.

Daphne brings lemonbars to Wilkie’s home, because being a girlfriend means baking treats for your man! She meets his father for the first time. “I’m not so sure what you see in him,” says his dad and that Daphne could do better than his son, who, by the way, will be going to boarding school next year.

On the way home, Doogie’s car gets a flat tire, leaving them stranded on a road. Doogie doesn’t understand how to use a spare. He borrowed this car from his dad and he doesn’t know anything about cars. His dad is going to be so pissed! Crazy lady let the air out, I bet. Hopefully, her hill people clan won’t find them. Pray the hill people don’t find them.

Emmett picks Bay up for prom. He has a new motorcycle. It better not be equipped with Bing. He got Bay a motorcycle helmet with her name on it. Regina wants them to hurry up and leave so she can get some.

Before they go to prom, they stop outside the building where Angelo is held. “You still want to go in?” Emmett asks, concerned that Bay might get sent to Mexico by mistake.

Bay meets Angelo. He tells her he needs money to call his lawyer in Italy, but he has no more money. Bay gives her the 40 bucks she has on her.

Travis took the bus to get to the Kennish home to pick up Daphne. He is wearing a tuxedo t-shirt, of course. When he goes inside to use the bathroom and probably steal something, a limousine pulls up. It’s Wilkie in a real tuxedo. Surprise! Daphne makes Wilkie take Travis with them, where Travis acts like a savage.

Bay and Emmett enter the prom. Daphne and Wilkie are already there and she tells him she knows about boarding school. Wilkie said was planning to tell her after prom. But it will sweet because it’s a girls’ boarding school. Whoa! He will be disguised as Wilka, the tall blonde girl. Sure “her” voice is just going to be a guy’s voice with a really high pitch, but that always fools people in movies.

Kathryn and Doogie are still waiting for a tow. It has been more than two hours. Doogie’s parents are taking a long time to come get them. They come close to kissing, but Kathryn pulls back. She decides it would be best to call Toby to get her. Unlike Doogie, Toby has his own car.

John catches Travis with a flask. Again, since John can’t sign, it takes him a while to communicate to the boy to hand over the booze. John finds a dark spot and sips from the flask. Melody sees him, takes the flask, and acts like John is in trouble, but then drinks. John says something to Melody, but then he can’t understand what Melody signs as a reply. John should not be allowed to chaperone when he can’t communicate with anyone. Kathryn finally arrives and husband and wife dance.

Meanwhile, Regina and her boyfriend return from their dinner date. They sneak around because they need to steal condoms from Toby. Regina’s boyfriend is a cheap bastard.

Wilkie tells Daphne about Emmett sleeping with Simone. Daphne goes to Emmett and asks if this is true. Emmett signs no, and totally makes a stiff-lipped face like he is trying to hide that he is lying. I didn’t know facial expressions came up while signing. Daphne knows he is lying. Wilkie asks if they should tell Bay. Wilkie is leaving soon; he wants to wreak havoc before he leaves.

Wilkie and Daphne share a goodbye kiss by a fireplace. Where is this prom? It can’t be in the school, right? This place looks nicer than I’d expect for a high school prom. The kids in the town I live in held their prom in a Ramada Inn.

Emmett confesses to Bay. She goes all angry Latina and throws her helmet into the lake or pond or moat—whatever it is the body of water by this palace.

John informs Regina that he talked to a lawyer about Angelo. He says the options aren’t good because Angelo has a criminal record, and they don’t want to get Bay involved, so having a US citizen child is out. John said Angelo could only stay if he marries a US citizen. The episode ends on Regina when John says that. Were they already married? I forget. This is a weird way to end the season. It kind of feels like the writers ran out of time.