The L.A. Complex: 2.07 “Half Way”

Connor has breakfast at Jen’s. Eric is still there. But Jen tells Connor that Eric will not be allowed to stay. “But he’s my BFF,” whines Connor.

Jen leaves the boys to go to another meeting. Eric gets drunk, which is the reason Jen separated from him in the first place. Connor wants to help his new buddy, but Eric warns, “I’m trouble, kid and when my twin brother comes by we’re Double Trouble.” To demonstrate, Eric breaks a vase. “This vase belonged to her parents,” Eric explains. “They died…in the Holocaust.” Eric decides to leave but Connor doesn’t want him driving drunk, so grabs the keys to his truck and drives it away.

Connor returns the truck later that day. Eric is waiting for him. Connor had fun. He did some laps and learned that when you drive a pick-up, every teenager outside a gas station asks you to buy them beer. Connor bought a replacement vase so Jen will never know. This teaches Eric that being a drunken buffoon is no way to live. I guess Connor hasn’t been a drunken buffoon for a while, either. Good for both of them then.

That evening, the three of them play a board game. Board games are the best way to spend an evening. Especially if you have more than one person. Because people judge you if you say you play Monopoly or Risk alone (it’s for practice, jeez). Connor notices that Jen is now affectionate with Eric.

Kaldrick’s story doesn’t make a lot of sense, even for this show. It begins with him in bed with the girl from his dad’s mission, but he is not able to get in the mood due to her clit not being nearly big enough.

Infinite Jest is suing Kaldrick for $1 million for the beating he received in Kaldrick’s fine palatial estate, but Jest’s lawyer offers to settle for $200,000. Kaldrick is in no mood for this foolishness and counters that Jester was trespassing and California laws allows him to defend his property. He will not settle.

Away from Infinite Jest, his lawyer calls his client an “idiot” and asks Kaldrick to “consider mentoring him.” The lawyer explains Jest looks up to Kaldrick and just wants to get his attention.

Later, Jest set Kaldrick’s car on fire. I wonder how The L.A. Complex got the money to destroy a car. I bet it involved Stephan Brogren picking up a rental car plus insurance fraud.

Kaldrick goes to Infinite Jest’s lawyer’s office, where the lawyer explains Jest, “has learning disabilities.” That is not a surprise. I don’t think it’s a barrier to getting into hip-hop either. Suddenly, Kaldrick and the lawyer start making out.  I bet Kaldrick gets really into it because he can fantasy he’s doing it with Barack Obama.

Raquel is still at Celebrity Halfway House. She makes sure the cameras only see her being sympathetic, such as when she has comforting words for a young fellow cast member named Zack, who fell into drug use after he lost out of the part of Harold. He ate White Castle nonstop for a month, and when the role went to John Cho, he had to fill his addiction to overrated hamburgers with something else.

There are no cameras in the bathroom, so this is where Raquel instructs Ricky Lloyd to go after Zack, so Ricky can be the bad boy and then Raquel can come in after as the caring one. Ricky is reluctant, but Raquel tells him, “Stop thinking.” Ricky does not want to yell and insult Zack unless provoked, so Raquel has to find a way to instigate it.

Raquel gets to work on that. “Don’t worry that Ricky has been telling everyone you’re a bitch and no one cares about you,” she tells Zack. Raquel sounds so nice when she says that, like a caring mother who wants her two little boys to fight for her love. Zack goes straight to Ricky, while Raquel lets out an evil chuckle. Raquel is a loser.

Zack is all, “What the flip man, don’t be jizzing on me!” and Ricky is like, “You stank boy! You stank!” Raquel steps in with a caring speech about how Zack is just like Ricky when Ricky was younger. Raquel pretends to care about people almost as well as Bill Clinton.

Zack over-dosed in his bedroom. The thought of being a young Ricky Lloyd has pushed him over the edge. This comes as a shock to everyone when Raquel opens his door. Except there are cameras in his bedroom so the producers would have seen him.

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